Writing an Online Dating Profile for Straight Guys
By James Howlett
Your online dating profile is the first glimpse into you that your prospective dates get. It is the first, and it could be the last if you write a boring and typical profile like 99% of people out there. You, however, have an advantage over all those average Joe's out there - you are reading this and I'm about to give you some great advice!
Once you've read through these tips take some time to think about what you are going to write and jot down some quick notes before hitting the keyboard.
The most IMPORTANT part of ANY profile!
The most effective way to get noticed online, is to include a photo. Choose a clear photo that shows you at your best light and preferably smiling - it makes much better viewing! Try to resist a body part shot at first. If she wants it - she'll ask for it! Web cams are to be avoided for pictures – they make you look like a mole!
Choose a fun Username!
This is the name that you will be known as by members on the dating site. I would advise you to use a name other than your real name to remain anonymous. Try and choose a name that is fun and reflects your personality, i.e. SpeedskaterSam or DJJAM. Do not use a name which is sexually provocative or offensive - the ladies will swarm AWAY.
However, do not get stuck defining yourself in the rest of your profile as the "Speedskater", or the "DJClubber". Why? Because once you do that, much of the MYSTERY is gone... and she just won't be as interested. That is one of the basic laws of attraction, whether you are meeting women online or in person.
Don't ever be "Mr. Lonely".
You do not trigger attraction by playing the poor me's, you do it by accentuating your strengths and attributes. Tell the single women out there what a catch you are by outlining your great characteristics in a confident and no-BS way. Take your strengths and showcase them in your profile or online and then COMBINE them with a vision of romance that paints a picture of a life that's more exciting than the life she's living. This shows her that you are not only a man who knows who he is, but also a man who knows how to truly discover the inner core of a woman. Communicating to women on this level drives them absolutely CRAZY... and you need to try it out.
Don't go blank - Maximize your presence instead!
Online dating sites have made it easy for you when completing your profile by providing drop down menus for basic questions such as your appearance, lifestyle, hobbies but you will also be given additional space to write something yourself. Use this space wisely to provide a more detailed description about your personality, your interests and what you are looking for. The key is to be confident and talk positively about yourself without coming across bigheaded.
Don't leave an empty space in any of the fields.
If you feel you have covered everything by answering the profile questions - please do not leave the additional space blank or write "ask me", "tell you later" or "I don't know what to say". Members will see your profile and think you're either not serious about dating or that if you can't be bothered to put some effort into writing a profile you will have the same approach in a relationship. Instead expand on the information already provided, for example, if you have stated you like travelling talk about some of the places you want to go next.
Create an exciting life!
If you don't have one, then make one. You are not going to meet a fantastic, interesting, single woman if you present your life is dull. Remember, they are looking for a little excitement too. So step out of your comfort zone and DO something adventurous - skydive, rappel, go bungee jumping - do something that's "radical" and BOLD. Now you have a very interesting experience you can talk about, not only online in your profile or in a singles place, but with anyone!
However, don't lie about interests; you will get found out! For example, don't say you love to skydive when in fact you'd shit your pants if you were ever in the plane with the door open. You'll attract the wrong person and waste both of your times and look really stupid in the process.
Show them your confidence.
Every guy has things about him that are attractive to single woman. The only problem is we usually don't know what they are. If you do know, can you communicate your attractive qualities in a way that AMPLIFIES or MAGNIFIES them? When trying to meet women online - don't use weak phrases like "some people say I'm..." or "I'm sort of..." Instead, demonstrate that you're a man who knows who you are by describing yourself in strong, concise terms. Don't exaggerate... don't brag, but don't be a wuss either.
Show your funny side!
I think if you can make someone laugh or someone makes you laugh, you're on the path to a good relationship. Show people that you have a sense of humor, e.g. talk about a scene from one of your all time favorite comedies and you may strike a chord with someone else who found the same thing just as funny as you.
Don't mention the ex!
Ok, so you may have just come out of a relationship and be feeling sad and lonely but don't write about it. It will put a lot of people off and you may come across as desperate, which is not an attractive trait. Make online dating a new start for you and promise yourself not to dwell on past relationships.
Show your sensual side.
Every woman wants a man who appreciates the sensual side of things. A single man who is "in touch" can ignite powerful, passionate feelings inside of a woman. But if you've ever done any "reconnaissance" online and read other guys' profiles - I'm sure you've seen that most men have NO CLUE about how to attract women... let alone "ignite feelings" in a woman who they are trying to meet.
So how do you do this? Well unfortunately, you can't just TELL a woman directly "Oh, I can make you feel great." You can do this so easily with the right words, whether you are meeting women online or whispering them in her ear. To do this in an online dating or singles arena, simply use vivid details. For instance, if you talk about the food you enjoy, don't just say you like fine wine... talk about how you love how a fine wine releases intoxicating aromas as it rolls around in your mouth. If you talk about a walk in the woods, don't just say you like walking on through the woods - describe in detail how you love the scent of the unsullied air or the sounds of the wind teasing the leaves the trees. Use sensual words like full, ripe, supple, harmonious, sway, grace, tender, etc. When you use words like these, although you're not talking directly about sex... you send a strong message that you know how to make a woman feel these erotic yet subtle feelings.
Finally, do not include any personal information in your profile, e.g. your e-mail address, home address, work address or telephone number. A reputable dating site will remove any personal information before it appears live on site; this is to ensure that they provide you with a safe online dating environment.
Once you've completed your profile, read through it or ask a trusted friend to read through it and ask, would you reply to this person? If yes, it's all systems go. If no, look at the areas where it can be improved until you've created that winning profile. It may take longer than 5 or 10 minutes but the results that will show in your inbox will be worth it!
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